Argh.

I'll be honest. I can't wait for Abby to be out. But then again, I dunno which'll exhaust me more. Lugging my baby around in my uterus or in my arms. Back's aching, and when I wake up, I cannot move my hips. I am waiting for the regular contractions to begin. In fact, I dowanna go school. Not to Maris. Not to NIE either. I just wanna be a stay home mum.

Okie. I'm awake now.

Indeed, the 3rd tri is so different from the 2nd one. Felt up & going and all. But now I just feel like a log. A painful log. I am deprived of sleep. Body needs sleep. But when body sleeps, the blood circulation stops apparently.

I dowanna go school either. I'm a standby relief teacher for now till 24th July. And it sucks coz u dunno the kids, and once u've established some kinda connection, time's up. Also, it dussen really pay to be pally with them the first time u encounter the class. They'll size u up and the next time u go in there, it's hell. So it's strict time all the way. And it's so boring.

I've been missing Poi Ching again. I've been to Seng Kang, Poi Ching, Temasek and Maris. And I still miss Poi Ching. Think most likely it's because there's ownership of the kids. But then again, why do I keep missing Mdm Foo & Ai Lei? Carina's no longer there though. Really appreciated Mdm Foo's guidance. She was frank and straightforward - at least there was communication and a relationship. Right now, (perhaps it's just such a bad time) I think people see the pregnancy more than they see me. Which sucks. My ability to perform is based on how pregnant I am. Sigh. But then again, i dun really have the strength to perform anything lah. Even for practicum, I just taught from the textbook. How original. How boring. I can't wait to soar in class again. Have I lost it?

Went to my GP again. He looked offended coz I said I wanted to extend the MC. So I've said something wrong lah. He did his routine checks plus a urine test. Told him i had a painful infection last week. Gave me this rusty 'sterile' kidney dish and told me to pee in it. Sent sample in for culture testing. Told him I was tested positive for Strep B in my first tri. Other than that, I could tell that he was in quite a difficult position also coz he din really know what to write to certify me unfit for school. So he kept insisting for me to go to my gynae to put me on antenatal leave. At least test for a week or two first (??) until I'm fit for school again. :P Sigh. I really just wanna stay home and sleep. Body not co-operating and my attitude stinks. What a combination. And the consultation cost $45. ~~~$45~~~

Must keep praying lor. Think I'm rotting liao.

Have been having vivid and occasionally sick dreams. Too sick to post here. Anyway, for last nite's dream, I dreamt that we caught the current maid with a pretty young guy at the petrol kiosk outside our place. He was on a bicycle. And she had a kinda ya-ya look. Then when we got back to the house *fast forward* and woke up, apparently the house was 'seized' by the boyfren. We were in a tacky and obiang looking bedroom, and when i tried to get out of bed, this sensor started flashing. The sensor looked damn odd, like those kinda electric chinese wedding lamps but damn tall. So it started flashing like the ambulance flash and the boyfriend and maid were alerted. Anyway, all our moves were being monitored lah. The maid became the queen of the house. Ben's parents weren't home. Think they were still in Thailand or something. Then I thought I had this conversation with Ben alone/or and with his mum about getting rid of the maid coz her true colours have appeared, but she was still rather reluctant to let her go. Hmm. Odd dream.