Blessed!

Just came back from Maris Stella High (Pri). I am truly truly blessed. The whole bunch of new teachers (Catherine, Jiawen, Yumei, Alan, Eugene, Meng Kiang (I think), Anita, Poh Qin and Huiling) are great, the school's lovely, the staff is really friendly too, the staff room is BEAUTIFUL! Big spacious L-shaped tables, one Mac for EACH table, apparently the staff recreation centre, which is shared by Pri and Sec, has got a pool table too! :P~~~ They allow teachers to specialise, even asked which level and subjects we liked best, what CCAs we'd prefer, etc etc. :) The EXCO's fun, and there are NO meetings for the June hols. Hahah... in fact, the whole mtg affair will take place from 20-23 June @ Batam during the staff retreat. Bummer, can't make it. Or else can gel with the group and not feel so out of place. Oh, and it's MORNING SESSION only. Met the P4 parents today coz they had P4 streaming exam talk, and most parents are well-dressed, educated and professional. Even met my Catering Sales Mgr from Shang - Josephine. :) Great to see her, her son's in 4D.

Ben's away (for most part of the day) from Fri to Sun on a Learning Weekend. It's a lonely weekend for me. His parents are returning from HK tonite. I need to organise the stationery and stock take Abby's stuff. I seriously think I over-bought. And the Great Singapore Sale is here. I hate it when I have a purpose to shop. I tend to indulge. Otherwise I can't shop for nuts. :)

OuCh

Lifted a heavy shopping bag to pay at the Robinson's cashier today and felt a strain in my belly. Hoping that Abby moves more.

Rest

Finally managed to spend a day at home doing FILING. Must say it isn't the most exciting job in the world. Well, at least the eyesore is gone, and the place is slightly neater.

Lina will be joining us! Yay!!! Well, she's my aunt's domestic helper and my aunt's family is going Sweden, so after some consideration, my in-laws would like to employ her. (Actually they were really keen on employing her...) and SHE CAN COOK! Yesh! Finally. Hahah... Hopefully she can help the current one be more disciplined and also guide her in keeping the house clean. Yes. Hopefully.

Watched Blast from the Past today - Brendan Fraser and Alicia Silverstone. Boy, the way he danced with the two women... wow. Where'd he learn to dance with two women in his shelter? Thought he had only learnt to dance with one.

Oh, and Bredan Fraser reminds me of Del... haha... dunno why. Goody-two-shoes? Or maybe just the build? Heh.

Anyway, God has been showing me many things, and I'm learning to be thankful in various circumstances (dun dare to say 'all' yet). And he has also shown me that when He closes one door, He opens several more! :) God is good all the time!

Received a lovely card from SL. I was touched beyond words. Her simple act of kindness and affection was really very therapeutic. And this is on top of the comforting SMSes she's been sending. I am sooooOOOooOOoOOooo loved!

Have been swimming every other day with Eve. Hahha... two whales in bikinis at CSC club. Gosh, on Sunday, one kid exclaimed as I emerged from the ladies to the pool, "Look! That GURL PREGNANT!" I turned and sMiLeD... some women smiled while men just thought it was strange. Some couldn't help but stare while others couldn't pretend for their lives that they weren't staring. Sigh. It was funny. Swam a couple of laps, dunno the length of the pool. Have been doing various lap combinations, so far so good. Not exhausted or anything, and I hope I can get my money's worth by going at least 6 times a month (subscription fee is $6 lah.) Seems that SAFRA is better though... Dunno if Ben would like to join. Then got nicer pool, but then this one wasted? Will think about it later.

Well, supposed to rest, but couldn't rest well last nite. Eve was telling me about her insomnia, and then I couldn't sleep. Shheeshh... issit contagious? Have been spending great time with her, she's like an older sis - guiding me and laughing at my bad jokes. Heheh... Well, now it's becoming clearer why God orchestrated that bumping into each other in NIE a year ago! :) It's great! :) Praise the Lord! :)

Well, gotta move on yah? Will be back and better! :)

Forever

I'll worship at Your Throne
Whisper my own love song
With all my heart I'll sing
For You my Dad and King
I'll live for all my days
To put a smile on Your face
And when we finally meet
It'll be for eternity

And Oh how wide You open up Your arms
When I need Your love
And how far You would come
If ever I was lost
And You said that all You feel for me
Is undying love
That You showed me through the cross

I'll worship You my God
I'll worship You my God
I love You
I love You
Forever I will sing
Forever I will be with You
Be with You

God help me.

The Power of Miscommunication

“Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered,
and it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects,
always trusts,
always hopes,
and always perseveres.”

1 Corinthians 13:4 –7

Was I impatient?
Was I unkind?
Was I envious?
Was I boasting?
Was I proud?
Was I rude?
Did I only seek to benefit myself?
Was I easily angered?
Did I keep a record of wrongs?
Did I delight in evil? Or rather, take delight in destruction?
Do I rejoice when God's truth prevails?

Was I protective over my friends?
Was I trusting?
Will I continue to hope?
Will I continue to persevere?

All I've learnt is friendship cannot be based on what we read on each other's blogs. Ben is right. As much as we claimed to be introverts, still we needed to get together regularly to hear each other out.

As my attempts to salvage the friendship and clarify misunderstandings go haywire, I am sitting in front of the keyboard, speechless.

I miss my friend. The one who helped me through really tough times. I really do miss her. She has decided to leave.

I know I've hurt you, if you are still visiting here.

And I've finally understood the Chinese saying - Yue Miao Yue Hei - indirectly meaning, the more you attempt to explain yourself, the worse it becomes.

I'm sorry. I really am.

Angels

Once upon a time, there were three angels. They were rather special friends, because ordinarily, they wouldn't be hanging out with other angels. They considered themselves unlike other angels, anti-social and introverted. Thus, as these three angels got together, it must have been something special because each held one another in high esteem and always kept a look out for each other.

There were times when one fell while the other two upheld the fallen one. Trust was established and the angels knew that none of them would do anything to each other out of self-ambition or benefit. Even though they didn't gather very often, all three held one another close to their hearts and their prayers, knowing that God had placed them together for a special purpose.

Once, during the angel’s gathering, an angel told the other one to confront her partner about a certain issue. Full of conviction and power, this bold angel had instructed the other one to stand firm during the confrontation. Indeed, there was boldness in her conviction in confronting the sensitive issue.

Soon after, another sensitive issue arose - this time it was with the bold angel. This angel was engaged in an entertaining but controversial activity, and the other angels felt that out of love, they had a responsibility to inform this angel about the potential 'danger' regarding the activity. However, when the subject was barely broached upon, the bold angel was deeply affected and subsequently, the other angels were hurt in the process. An action that was done out of love had been twisted and misunderstood.

Although both issues were different in nature, both were sensitive and had the potential to create negative impact. One was physical and could be witnessed with the eye. The other was spiritual and could only be discerned with the guidance of the Holy Spirit. The former had consequences which was born by family members and closed ones; the other also had similar consequences - unfortunately, loved ones couldn't explain how or why these consequences came about. Thus, the first was more direct and could be addressed strictly as it had become a common topic to address. But not for the latter...

However, out of obedience and perhaps an obligation to be a good angel, the controversial activity was substituted with another less controversial one. Sadly, the angels could feel that the relationships had been partially strained, as this bold but obedient angel had to oblige by 'heavenly' rules although she did not really believe in them very much. Out of love, the angel had obeyed after much contemplation, confusion and frustration.

An apology note was delivered, yet the note caused more damage then ever before. It was not the intention of the other two to undermine the obedient angel's effort to be a good angel. Although the obedient angel tried to apologise, at the same time, there was much justification of her efforts to be a good angel. Thus, more misunderstanding and hurt took place and neither angel replied to the note, as both were at a loss for words.

All this happened while another seemingly happy occasion took place. The obedient angel had found a partner whom she could relate to, who adored her and worshiped the ground she walked on. The whole world seemed to celebrate for this angel, except for the two angels who seemed to be wet blankets amidst the celebratory season. Slowly, the angel who found happiness had a dream and realised that one of the two angels seemed unhappy. She tried to make contact with the sad angel but had little success.

As the angel met with her newfound happiness, she had suspected that the sad angel would be upset, perhaps. Unfortunately, as the sad angel was fighting demons in her daily dungeon, she had not realised that there was a festival held in honour of the happy angel. Thus, when the happy angel met the busy angel, the busy one did not understand why the happy angel asked if the sad angel was upset with the happy one.

Then, when the busy one went to the heavenly notice board, she was very taken aback by what had happened. She had not expected the festival to take place so quickly. In fact, she recalled the words the happy angel had proclaimed when the three of them met ~ that no festival would take place until the prince from afar and the prince at the door were fairly dealt with ~ and that would take place after three full moons. However, as the prince at the door proclaimed his love, the angel's heart melted and fell in love with the prince, albeit rather quickly.

The sad angel really loved the happy angel, but was really disappointed as the trust that was built was broken. The sad angel realised that the happy angel had not kept her words. Perhaps she had forgotten the word she had given them. Or perhaps the happy angel felt that her happiness was more important than the word she had pronounced. Or perhaps, as this revelation of love was a rare opportunity, she took it up and believed that her close angels would understand and be happy for her.

The other angel was equally astounded. But she also determined in her heart to love the happy angel regardless of whatever had happened. Yet, at the same time, she could not comprehend what had happened to the faraway prince. Although he had a gift to make others feel real special, yet she also understood that opening his heart to an angel required great courage. Could the faraway prince be brokenhearted upon news of the sudden union? No one knew anymore.

Amidst the celebratory mood, the happy angel realised that her two close angels were not present to rejoice with her. She tried to find the cause of the absence. Perhaps it was due to the prince’s hot pursuit. Or it could be due to poor relationship management skills. There was no definite answer within her, so decided to focus on happy things instead. She had other heavenly hosts who were teasing the new couple, her family who believed her life was finally coming together and the prince's mother who took a definite liking to her.

The sad and hurt angels did not know what to do. The happy angel had gladly proclaimed intimate relations with the prince ~ yet the two angels knew that the Master would be hurt. Hurt, exasperation, misunderstandings, anger, bitterness, impatience, self-defence, and other bitter plants were taking root among the God-given friends. No one knew what to do anymore.

Both the angels were afraid. They were also tired of the defensive nature of the happy angel ~ it seemed as if the happy angel believed that the angels did not love her and did not want best for her. Finally, they went to the Master to heal their wounds and give them wisdom, but most importantly, heal the friendship and re-establish whatever had been lost.

One of the angels then used the Master's word as a mirror and mounted it on the heavenly notice board. This divine mirror reflected three characters: the Mocker, the Wicked and the Wise Man. What any angel saw in the in reflection was merely an indication of their response to counsel. The mirror had no special twisted powers. Yet, as the sad angel asked the angel who had erected the mirror if it was for the happy angel, the angel replied, "This mirror is for anyone who stands in front of it. The character that is reflected is merely a reflection of one's actions, or reactions to counsel."

Thus, when the happy angel stood in front of it, thoughts began running through her mind. First, she wondered why the mirror was erected. Later, she recalled her reaction to the loving but controversial counsel the sad angel had given. Finally, she decided that it was best if she would just appear still and apologise whether any given counsel was justified, reasonable or sensible. Perhaps to the happy angel, the controversial 'counsel' wasn’t truly justified, reasonable nor sensible. Yet, out of love and boldness, the sad angel did what she believed was the right thing to do while the other angel just held her tongue, knowing full well the extent of the happy angel’s potential reaction. Perhaps the quiet angel was timid, unlike the sad angel. Or perhaps, she did not know when to take the gamble, unlike the sad angel who tried hinting, in one sentence, about the controversial activity and elicited a strong reaction. However, the quiet angel was glad that the sad angel did what she did. Once, the quiet angel had almost lost a loved one due to the controversial activity, and a host of heavenly beings was engaged in battle to fight for the oblivious soul who had disintegrated and inflicted grave hurt to his family. More importantly, the soul had hurt the Master deeply. Out of grace, the Master rescued the soul from the deep dungeons of captivity. Yet the soul was blinded to the warfare that had taken place. After witnessing the damage caused, the quiet angel began to grasp the full extent of this seemingly harmless but controversial activity.

The angels still loved one another although there was much confusion among them. Until the Master intervenes and puts everything in order once again, one can only pray for the best.

My Favourite Things

I like

| strawberry & butter sandwiches in the middle of the night | watching Ben come out from the office after a hard day's work | meeting up with old friends and catching up with what marvellous things God has done and is doing in their lives | seeing them walk real close to God and obeying His word against all odds | feel Abby wobble in my belly | smelling Joy after her bath | seeing God's miracles unfold as we persist on staying at His feet | receiving words of comfort through God's people as He speaks to them | seeing Ben's eyes light up whenever he tastes yummy food | spending saturday nights having silly fun eating durians and thinking of strange names for them | watching Ranz & Melissa's productions | listening to Ranz encourage mummy with the word of God | receiving messages from mummy telling me she loves me | receiving messages from daddy telling me he loves me | finding all sorts of strange ways to tell Ben I love him to death | finding even stranger ways to rescue a certain pretty maiden from her dungeon | laughing myself silly at silly things | finding out that I can be silly with people who love me | helping Ben do menial tasks so that he can soar at his workplace | praising God with every breath that I have while driving | catching K102.3FM in the mornings | waking up in the mornings | taking hot showers in the mornings | feeling great as Abby wakes me up in the mornings | getting massages at night | seeing my mummy in law smile | watching my daddy in law make my mummy in law smile | watching the both of them hold hands | holding hands with Ben | shaking hands with Joy | messaging my girlfriends silly messages | reading Siew Lin's messages | wearing my wedding ring | reading Mother's Day cards written in a heartfelt manner by children | counselling children and getting across to them | enjoying God | knowing that I'm being enjoyed by Him.

These are blessings (and more!) I received recently.

K102.3FM

Great program in the mornings and evenings, especially going to and from work. It's a Christian Radio Station (selected periods throughout the day only) combined with Indonesia's broadcast station. To be safe, tune in at 8.30am and 5.30am daily from Mondays to Saturdays for English program, "Voice of Grace". If you understand various dialects, a Bible study takes place from 11pm to 1am at night.

Verse for the Day

Proverbs 9:7-9
"Whoever corrects a mocker invites insult;
whoever rebukes a wicked man incurs abuse.
Do not rebuke a mocker or he will hate you;
rebuke a wise man and he will love you.
Instruct a wise man and he will be wiser still;
teach a righteous man and he will add to his learning."

or the NLT...
Proverbs 9:7-9
Anyone who rebukes a mocker will get a smart retort. Anyone who rebukes the wicked will get hurt. So don't bother rebuking mockers; they will only hate you. But the wise, when rebuked, will love you all the more. Teach the wise, and they will be wiser. Teach the righteous, and they will learn more.