Many books are staring at me... I really wanna read them but haven't been able to do so. Not good. Will start re-reading again. Currently reading too many books. And not reading enough. Anyway, need to start getting into 'school' mode once again.
My sis-in-law & her hubby came back last nite! It was a surprise early homecoming! they were due on the 4th July but popped back just to surprise us! I was so shocked, yet I was so so glad to see her! I almost hugged her!! Gosh. I'm so glad she's fine. Was superly worried for her, poor girl. They (She) had a tough time down under (pun intended). :P
Went to Aromatic House for my $100 (plust top up) massage today. Finally. It's over. No more aromatic house. Praise the Lord. I dunno if I blogged this, but if they ever dare to ask me to sign up their package again, I'll... I'll... I'll... say no! *Hmmph!*
Wednesday, June 29, 2005
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
Thoughts, emotions and reactions
Every thought that we have creates a powerful neural chemical reaction in our brain, which in turn causes us to feel certain emotions. We act and react based on those emotions.
Great article. :) Provides the overall picture to my previous post regarding logic following emotions. Instead of how a speaker terms it as 'logic following emotions', I think it should be simply stating it as 'reactions based on emotions'. Indeed, without a stimulus, there won't be emotions, and how we react stems also from our existing belief system & schema.
With this understanding, it puts the person in a better position to be in control and not be just blindly and helplessly led by the whirlwind of emotions. Unlike the wind, where we know not where it blows from, at least we do have an understanding of where most of our emotions origin - by how we think.
Great article. :) Provides the overall picture to my previous post regarding logic following emotions. Instead of how a speaker terms it as 'logic following emotions', I think it should be simply stating it as 'reactions based on emotions'. Indeed, without a stimulus, there won't be emotions, and how we react stems also from our existing belief system & schema.
With this understanding, it puts the person in a better position to be in control and not be just blindly and helplessly led by the whirlwind of emotions. Unlike the wind, where we know not where it blows from, at least we do have an understanding of where most of our emotions origin - by how we think.
Monday, June 27, 2005
Photos: IMM
We went IMM for the Young Parents Fair on Friday. Abby *loved* the kiddy ride! And it was ONE DOLLAR! It's still $0.20 at Toa Payoh. But $1? And for a rather short ride?
She loved it. She wouldn't let her granny support her during the ride and kept pushing her hand away and happily steered the rocking vehicle.
And check out the colours here. Guess what colour I wore?
Exactly the same as Abby. What a threesome. (Check out the girl behind Abby. And the kiddy ride seat. Fuschia must be the latest hottest colour.)
She loved it. She wouldn't let her granny support her during the ride and kept pushing her hand away and happily steered the rocking vehicle.
And check out the colours here. Guess what colour I wore?
Exactly the same as Abby. What a threesome. (Check out the girl behind Abby. And the kiddy ride seat. Fuschia must be the latest hottest colour.)
Reflection: My Past and My Emotions
Still in thinking mode - amazed by what God has done in my life. I used to be in quite a bad state. Recently, I was just sharing with ben about emotions - how humans are actually creatures of emotion (phrase not mine) - logic follows emotions - not the other way around as we often prefer to think. Yet emotions are only natural - they are not right or wrong - it's wat we do with our emotions that have consequences. And about consequences - we won't know the full extent of possible consequences of our (sometimes foolish) choices until we're made our choices and experience the full effect of it (and then regret because we feel terrible).
Looking back at my past, I wondered how I could have just 'fallen in love' so easily. Actually, what's falling in love? Is it that rush of emotions, that sense of happiness, excitment, constant thoughts of a 'significant other'? Actually, it's all quite human, and quite natural. Take for instance, kids. When they make new friends, friends who actually like them, they'll look forward to meeting them again and again, and will keep thinking about them. Only when we reach puberty then we start to complicate matters with definitions. Such feelings are termed as 'crushes', 'falling in love', etc. Then after the feelings fade, we think, "Hey, actually I don't really fancy this person after all." Then the relationship ends.
If only we did not put so much emphasis on our emotions. If only we could take it in stride, accept these rushing emotions as they come (and will definitely subside), and still preserve the friendship. Surely it's because the other person makes us feel good, that's why we feel so positively (and intensely) about that person in return.
What got me started thinking about all these is - if the other person is a guy, does that mean that I'm a flirt? If the other person is a girl, does it mean that I'm a homosexual? If I were just an innocent kid, all these emotions would not have any connotations right? In other words, I've come to accept that these emotions are just part and parcel of life - that it happens in any age. It doesn't mean it's love at first sight, or just falling in love.
Because all this talk, actions and reactions based on emotions cheapen love. I've come to learn that in a marriage, these emotions we feel (when we're in love) are really the icing on the cake. It doesn't mean that if the icing seems to be fading (and then resume again at times), the cake isn't there either. Commitment and hard work in the marriage is really important. We've learnt that there are rules to abide by in the marriage so that both will be protected (together) in the marriage.
I used to hate men alot. I couldn't trust them, and with my background, it's really a miracle I got married. What Ben said that got me to *start* believing in him was, "Always remember that I will never do anything to hurt you deliberately." Even though at times I felt like he was (and vice versa), what he said stabilised me despite my raging feelings. I didn't feel that I needed to be defensive and protective over myself because I took the risk to believe him. I had many reasons *not* to, yet because of his words (which he often reminded me), I've come to realise that he truly loves me.
And after a traumatising experience that almost made me tear this relationship apart, my mother told me, "You've hurt Ben enough. From now onwards, you will have to protect his heart and never ever hurt him like that ever again." That responsibility (that I realised was entrusted to me) was one that I resolved to undertake and commit myself to.
Although emotions will wax and wane, and other relationships (be it male or female) may seem more attractive and seem to provide more comfort, it is really a commitment to work on the marriage and keep it the most awesome relationship next to God's. As I keep on praying and asking God to teach me to love (and bless) Ben more, I find myself deeper and deeper in a wonderful relationship. It didn't start out like that. In fact, it was *very* emotional when we first started out, much like a fiery furnace. Now, it's becoming a steady glow. Although we do have our disagreements at times, we have established our rules to abide by. For instance, when we have conflicts, one of my requests to him is that he has to hold me (my hand at least). My love language is physical touch, and if he withholds that from me, it hurts extra. Likewise, when we have conflicts, I have to keep my voice controlled and low and not sound like I'm scolding him. That would be utterly disrespectful and I personally think that since he has no hearing problems, I don't really have to raise my voice to get my point across.
Yet, I've found that the most effective method especially in times of conflict is to ask God to speak to each other on the other person's behalf. Especially when either of us are emotionally charged, we won't be able to speak coherently (although we 'think' we are). We always think that we're right, until we reflect and then realise what crappy behaviour we've exposed our loved ones to. And to think we dare say that they are our loved ones when even acquaintances - people who don't mean much to us - get to see the nicer side of us.
Today, we went to our church's Parents' Day lunch. It was quite a bad start coz there were communication problems (over the phone). Absolutely trivial, yet most definitely irritating. It was *great* opportunity to spoil the whole lunch (such trivialities have 'destroyed' events before). I wanted Ben to do me a favour, yet he was telling me to do otherwise. I was quite upset; so was he. Yet finally when we met (he came from home, I arrived from church), both of us just let the issue melt and just held each other. I could see that he wasn't really listening and I could understand why. His parents were at our church function. It's significant. So both of us just let the matter slide and didn't even talk about it. (If it was in the past, we'd have scratched each other's eyeballs out and made EVERYONE at the table totally uncomfortable staring at two eyeball-less fuming creatures. We dun give face one.) So, it's definitely God's love. And it's awesome.
With what I've done, I don't deserve such a relationship. Yet by His grace, He has blessed me beyond what I can even ask or imagine.
Looking back at my past, I wondered how I could have just 'fallen in love' so easily. Actually, what's falling in love? Is it that rush of emotions, that sense of happiness, excitment, constant thoughts of a 'significant other'? Actually, it's all quite human, and quite natural. Take for instance, kids. When they make new friends, friends who actually like them, they'll look forward to meeting them again and again, and will keep thinking about them. Only when we reach puberty then we start to complicate matters with definitions. Such feelings are termed as 'crushes', 'falling in love', etc. Then after the feelings fade, we think, "Hey, actually I don't really fancy this person after all." Then the relationship ends.
If only we did not put so much emphasis on our emotions. If only we could take it in stride, accept these rushing emotions as they come (and will definitely subside), and still preserve the friendship. Surely it's because the other person makes us feel good, that's why we feel so positively (and intensely) about that person in return.
What got me started thinking about all these is - if the other person is a guy, does that mean that I'm a flirt? If the other person is a girl, does it mean that I'm a homosexual? If I were just an innocent kid, all these emotions would not have any connotations right? In other words, I've come to accept that these emotions are just part and parcel of life - that it happens in any age. It doesn't mean it's love at first sight, or just falling in love.
Because all this talk, actions and reactions based on emotions cheapen love. I've come to learn that in a marriage, these emotions we feel (when we're in love) are really the icing on the cake. It doesn't mean that if the icing seems to be fading (and then resume again at times), the cake isn't there either. Commitment and hard work in the marriage is really important. We've learnt that there are rules to abide by in the marriage so that both will be protected (together) in the marriage.
I used to hate men alot. I couldn't trust them, and with my background, it's really a miracle I got married. What Ben said that got me to *start* believing in him was, "Always remember that I will never do anything to hurt you deliberately." Even though at times I felt like he was (and vice versa), what he said stabilised me despite my raging feelings. I didn't feel that I needed to be defensive and protective over myself because I took the risk to believe him. I had many reasons *not* to, yet because of his words (which he often reminded me), I've come to realise that he truly loves me.
And after a traumatising experience that almost made me tear this relationship apart, my mother told me, "You've hurt Ben enough. From now onwards, you will have to protect his heart and never ever hurt him like that ever again." That responsibility (that I realised was entrusted to me) was one that I resolved to undertake and commit myself to.
Although emotions will wax and wane, and other relationships (be it male or female) may seem more attractive and seem to provide more comfort, it is really a commitment to work on the marriage and keep it the most awesome relationship next to God's. As I keep on praying and asking God to teach me to love (and bless) Ben more, I find myself deeper and deeper in a wonderful relationship. It didn't start out like that. In fact, it was *very* emotional when we first started out, much like a fiery furnace. Now, it's becoming a steady glow. Although we do have our disagreements at times, we have established our rules to abide by. For instance, when we have conflicts, one of my requests to him is that he has to hold me (my hand at least). My love language is physical touch, and if he withholds that from me, it hurts extra. Likewise, when we have conflicts, I have to keep my voice controlled and low and not sound like I'm scolding him. That would be utterly disrespectful and I personally think that since he has no hearing problems, I don't really have to raise my voice to get my point across.
Yet, I've found that the most effective method especially in times of conflict is to ask God to speak to each other on the other person's behalf. Especially when either of us are emotionally charged, we won't be able to speak coherently (although we 'think' we are). We always think that we're right, until we reflect and then realise what crappy behaviour we've exposed our loved ones to. And to think we dare say that they are our loved ones when even acquaintances - people who don't mean much to us - get to see the nicer side of us.
Today, we went to our church's Parents' Day lunch. It was quite a bad start coz there were communication problems (over the phone). Absolutely trivial, yet most definitely irritating. It was *great* opportunity to spoil the whole lunch (such trivialities have 'destroyed' events before). I wanted Ben to do me a favour, yet he was telling me to do otherwise. I was quite upset; so was he. Yet finally when we met (he came from home, I arrived from church), both of us just let the issue melt and just held each other. I could see that he wasn't really listening and I could understand why. His parents were at our church function. It's significant. So both of us just let the matter slide and didn't even talk about it. (If it was in the past, we'd have scratched each other's eyeballs out and made EVERYONE at the table totally uncomfortable staring at two eyeball-less fuming creatures. We dun give face one.) So, it's definitely God's love. And it's awesome.
With what I've done, I don't deserve such a relationship. Yet by His grace, He has blessed me beyond what I can even ask or imagine.
Saturday, June 25, 2005
Thinking...
I've heard this a couple of times: Who you are in five years' time is a result of the people you mix with and the books you read. Well, if you don't read books, we'll just have to accept all forms of the media - movies, computer, etc. If we're just busy in our own thoughts, not receiving fresh input but just brewing the same pot of thoughts, we'll just stagnate. It's scary, but we can be so blinded by ourselves that it'll take a miracle to achieve a paradigm shift.
I'm really grateful that God's been putting wonderful people into our lives. It's strange how friendships develop, yet it seems like the most natural thing to do. I just hope that as we continue to communicate, we'll enrich one another's lives and help each other become a better person. I've learnt alot from the people around me as I observe their strengths and am just humbled by their perserverance, enthusiasm and commitment to making other peoples' lives better.
I just hope that I'll be able to do likewise to the people around me and be a blessing to them - now or in five years' time.
I'm really grateful that God's been putting wonderful people into our lives. It's strange how friendships develop, yet it seems like the most natural thing to do. I just hope that as we continue to communicate, we'll enrich one another's lives and help each other become a better person. I've learnt alot from the people around me as I observe their strengths and am just humbled by their perserverance, enthusiasm and commitment to making other peoples' lives better.
I just hope that I'll be able to do likewise to the people around me and be a blessing to them - now or in five years' time.
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
My firstborn
Abby finally visited godma Elise today! :) We had an enjoyable time there. I was pleasantly surprised. So surprised that I realised I've been proclaiming negative expectations of Abby, like I owe it to the world to warn them that she'll misbehave anytime. That sucked. Thank God Elise was there to make sure I didn't smother Abby with my negative expectations. Abby actually played with Elise's mum, granny and aunt while Elise and I had dinner! Only when I appeared then the tears started rolling. For a short while anyway.
I've been so pressured by the 'competition' at home that I think I've been abit off balanced. I started out ambitious etc, using 'tried and tested methods', but in the process, I lost out in connecting with my girl. So strange. I see her so attached to her granny and I don't feel good about it. I've got three months holiday but I can't take care of my girl or else her granny will be 'lost'. Dussen help that abby's way more expressive now and literally throws herself at her granny. All these thoughts have been running amok in my head for the longest time. Then I realised what a mother I've become.
"See? Mummy scold you, dun worry, mama won't scold you." Those words, although unintentional and mindless, stabbed. Yet they allowed me to reflect on the type of parent I have become. Strict disciplinarian. Worse thing - allowing Abby to CIO has backfired - simply because she thinks I'm an unconcerned parent. In her eyes, I'm really quite distant. I don't feed her (mainly granny and helper), bathe her (granny), but I play with her. Yet, because she's not attached to me (coz I dun provide comfort), she'll throw herself at her granny the moment she appears at the door. She'll keep looking at the door and wait for the granny to appear. Once, I was trying to get her to sleep. It was past midnight coz she woke up and was struggling. Granny came in. She threw herself on her (which made her granny fall backwards and lie down on the bed) and then stared at me while lying on her bosom. Total silence. I could hear my own heart shatter into a million pieces. I walked away because I couldn't bear the scene. I cried silently in the bathroom.
Then Ben helped me realise that because I always walk away when granny appears, abby has learnt that pattern.
I must learn to be assertive yet not hurt the grandmother-granddaughter relationship. Something is really wrong with me. Abby can call 'Ah ma' (which she does whenever her granny appears and looks straight in the eye and calls out), mama (calling for granny also), 'Jie jie' (for Lina), 'Baba' and 'Deh-dee' for Ben. For me? 'EH'.
Ben hopes that through the timetable which we've worked out, things will change for the better. I'll finally get a chance to feed my own daughter and not fear that someone may take over suddenly. Each night, I can only pray that God will teach me to be a better mother and be a blessing to my very own daughter.
Sometimes I wonder if I really gave birth to her. Yet, as I speak these thoughts aloud to her, I unknowingly hurt her. Ben tells me to stop pushing Abigail away. Am I?
I'm really confused, yet I know things will improve, because I'm committed to making things improve. My emotions are running wild, yet I have hope.
After today, I realise things aren't that bad after all. I just hope Abby will give me another chance to work on our relationship.
I've been so pressured by the 'competition' at home that I think I've been abit off balanced. I started out ambitious etc, using 'tried and tested methods', but in the process, I lost out in connecting with my girl. So strange. I see her so attached to her granny and I don't feel good about it. I've got three months holiday but I can't take care of my girl or else her granny will be 'lost'. Dussen help that abby's way more expressive now and literally throws herself at her granny. All these thoughts have been running amok in my head for the longest time. Then I realised what a mother I've become.
"See? Mummy scold you, dun worry, mama won't scold you." Those words, although unintentional and mindless, stabbed. Yet they allowed me to reflect on the type of parent I have become. Strict disciplinarian. Worse thing - allowing Abby to CIO has backfired - simply because she thinks I'm an unconcerned parent. In her eyes, I'm really quite distant. I don't feed her (mainly granny and helper), bathe her (granny), but I play with her. Yet, because she's not attached to me (coz I dun provide comfort), she'll throw herself at her granny the moment she appears at the door. She'll keep looking at the door and wait for the granny to appear. Once, I was trying to get her to sleep. It was past midnight coz she woke up and was struggling. Granny came in. She threw herself on her (which made her granny fall backwards and lie down on the bed) and then stared at me while lying on her bosom. Total silence. I could hear my own heart shatter into a million pieces. I walked away because I couldn't bear the scene. I cried silently in the bathroom.
Then Ben helped me realise that because I always walk away when granny appears, abby has learnt that pattern.
I must learn to be assertive yet not hurt the grandmother-granddaughter relationship. Something is really wrong with me. Abby can call 'Ah ma' (which she does whenever her granny appears and looks straight in the eye and calls out), mama (calling for granny also), 'Jie jie' (for Lina), 'Baba' and 'Deh-dee' for Ben. For me? 'EH'.
Ben hopes that through the timetable which we've worked out, things will change for the better. I'll finally get a chance to feed my own daughter and not fear that someone may take over suddenly. Each night, I can only pray that God will teach me to be a better mother and be a blessing to my very own daughter.
Sometimes I wonder if I really gave birth to her. Yet, as I speak these thoughts aloud to her, I unknowingly hurt her. Ben tells me to stop pushing Abigail away. Am I?
I'm really confused, yet I know things will improve, because I'm committed to making things improve. My emotions are running wild, yet I have hope.
After today, I realise things aren't that bad after all. I just hope Abby will give me another chance to work on our relationship.
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
Second Wedding Anniversary
It's been two years. It's been awesome.
It's been said that the first year of marriage is always the toughest (accompanied by the first year after the first baby is born), but God's been faithful. He has given us a common vision so that we can run this race of life together. This teamwork has been a beautiful tango, and it is only truly by God's grace that we have an awesome marriage.
When we first got together, I was in a mess. So was he. But he was slightly better. He had just gotten out of his mess with his suicidal ex-gf and was about to swear off all women. Then he decided to check out his ol' flame (me) and found out I was *still* trying to make a clean break with a guy who didn't know how to break up. It ended terribly. But at least that guy never surfaced again.
So two dysfunctional people got together. Two dysfunctional people who always enjoyed the bubble they shared with each other and fiercely protected it from anyone who even *thought* about intruding their bubble. After attending courses, we got to know each other painfully better. In that process, we grew to love each other more. We learnt to communicate better and respect each other alot. ALOT. He learnt to lead and love. I learnt to submit.
"My desire shall be for my husband". So says God. And I'm glad He did. There's no other person I'd rather spend the rest of my life with. Through these two years, our love has deepened and grown stronger. From a fiery passionate fire, it has become a steady glow. And it's glowing bright and strong.
I've learnt that a great marriage takes hard work. And it's been an awesome and enjoyable journey.
Thanks love. You've enriched my life greatly just by your presence.
Like my cross-stitch - a surprise gift for him - our marriage is still work-in-progress (outlining still not done!). Thank God it is. We owe it to Abigail (and the rest to come) to have a strong and god-loving marriage. I know the pain inflicted by a broken marriage. And I pray that by God's grace and our hard work, we'll have a healthy marriage. May we also be always teachable, respectful and submissive to one another.
Happy 2nd anniversary, Love. Thanks for believing in me.
It's been said that the first year of marriage is always the toughest (accompanied by the first year after the first baby is born), but God's been faithful. He has given us a common vision so that we can run this race of life together. This teamwork has been a beautiful tango, and it is only truly by God's grace that we have an awesome marriage.
When we first got together, I was in a mess. So was he. But he was slightly better. He had just gotten out of his mess with his suicidal ex-gf and was about to swear off all women. Then he decided to check out his ol' flame (me) and found out I was *still* trying to make a clean break with a guy who didn't know how to break up. It ended terribly. But at least that guy never surfaced again.
So two dysfunctional people got together. Two dysfunctional people who always enjoyed the bubble they shared with each other and fiercely protected it from anyone who even *thought* about intruding their bubble. After attending courses, we got to know each other painfully better. In that process, we grew to love each other more. We learnt to communicate better and respect each other alot. ALOT. He learnt to lead and love. I learnt to submit.
"My desire shall be for my husband". So says God. And I'm glad He did. There's no other person I'd rather spend the rest of my life with. Through these two years, our love has deepened and grown stronger. From a fiery passionate fire, it has become a steady glow. And it's glowing bright and strong.
I've learnt that a great marriage takes hard work. And it's been an awesome and enjoyable journey.
Thanks love. You've enriched my life greatly just by your presence.
Like my cross-stitch - a surprise gift for him - our marriage is still work-in-progress (outlining still not done!). Thank God it is. We owe it to Abigail (and the rest to come) to have a strong and god-loving marriage. I know the pain inflicted by a broken marriage. And I pray that by God's grace and our hard work, we'll have a healthy marriage. May we also be always teachable, respectful and submissive to one another.
Happy 2nd anniversary, Love. Thanks for believing in me.
Monday, June 20, 2005
The Graduate-Level Test: Self-defense by Os Hillman
He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. ~ Psalm 37:6
As a believer grows in trusting obedience and love, God often brings a test that seems uncharacteristically cruel. The test: being wrongfully judged by those close to you. It is not for the reactionary. It cannot be passed over by simply gutting it out. Supernatural grace is the only means of passing this one. It is one of those tests the Savior had to experience Himself when being tried by the court of public opinion, the religious community, and the government of His day. His response to the government was silence. His response to the religious establishment was silence at the final judgment.
To the rest of His accusers He remained quiet and left vindication to the Father. He lived the commandment He gave to the disciples:
"But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because He is kind to the ungrateful and wicked" (Luke 6:35).
How do you react when you are accused or mistreated for no reason? Do you listen quietly, or do you justify each and every action? Most of us take pride in doing what is right and expect the same from others, especially our brothers and sisters in the faith. Jesus knew that if you were to be a true follower of His, you would enter this test eventually. It is part of the program. The workplace gives ample opportunity to be wronged, misunderstood, and maligned. When God brings a measured assault against one of His children, it is to find out if he truly believes in the cross. The cross is where each of us is given the opportunity to die to our pride, our reputations, and our ego. When He allows a measured assault upon us, it is to find out if the cross is sufficient. He wants to see if we will seek to rescue ourselves. Jesus said if we die with Him, we will be raised with Him. When God allows satan to bring the measured assault, ask God for the grace to cling to the cross. Let the pride and arrogance that Jesus wants to remove from our lives be crucified.
Thank God for the opportunity to be crucified with Christ. Then your righteousness will shine like the noonday sun and the justice of your cause will be in His hands.
My lesson to learn.
As a believer grows in trusting obedience and love, God often brings a test that seems uncharacteristically cruel. The test: being wrongfully judged by those close to you. It is not for the reactionary. It cannot be passed over by simply gutting it out. Supernatural grace is the only means of passing this one. It is one of those tests the Savior had to experience Himself when being tried by the court of public opinion, the religious community, and the government of His day. His response to the government was silence. His response to the religious establishment was silence at the final judgment.
To the rest of His accusers He remained quiet and left vindication to the Father. He lived the commandment He gave to the disciples:
"But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because He is kind to the ungrateful and wicked" (Luke 6:35).
How do you react when you are accused or mistreated for no reason? Do you listen quietly, or do you justify each and every action? Most of us take pride in doing what is right and expect the same from others, especially our brothers and sisters in the faith. Jesus knew that if you were to be a true follower of His, you would enter this test eventually. It is part of the program. The workplace gives ample opportunity to be wronged, misunderstood, and maligned. When God brings a measured assault against one of His children, it is to find out if he truly believes in the cross. The cross is where each of us is given the opportunity to die to our pride, our reputations, and our ego. When He allows a measured assault upon us, it is to find out if the cross is sufficient. He wants to see if we will seek to rescue ourselves. Jesus said if we die with Him, we will be raised with Him. When God allows satan to bring the measured assault, ask God for the grace to cling to the cross. Let the pride and arrogance that Jesus wants to remove from our lives be crucified.
Thank God for the opportunity to be crucified with Christ. Then your righteousness will shine like the noonday sun and the justice of your cause will be in His hands.
My lesson to learn.
Saturday, June 18, 2005
I gave someone a bad rating!
Gosh! I never knew I'd do something like that. But I think bad sellers should be exposed.
I bidded and won a top for $10 on Y! Auctions the other day from this seller. Seller emailed me and asked to transfer $14 to her account. Something wasn't right. Then I replied to clarify - why $4 postage when normal local postage is $1 (add $2 for registered mail). Told her either I pick up or send via normal post. Even included the url for local postal rates.
She replied saying that she'd 'distriduted' (?) the price in the postage (whatever that means) and then subsequently acknowledged that she'd added $3 profit to the item in the postage. So $13 (for a $10 item), wan or not?
Super dishonest. Therefore the bad rating.
I don't think this is the usual practice in the auctions arena. I've traded there a couple of times, so far the sellers and buyers have been rather fantastic. But this one... *shake head*
What if she wanted a $10 profit instead?
So a war might begin here, well, too bad. She's dishonest what.
I bidded and won a top for $10 on Y! Auctions the other day from this seller. Seller emailed me and asked to transfer $14 to her account. Something wasn't right. Then I replied to clarify - why $4 postage when normal local postage is $1 (add $2 for registered mail). Told her either I pick up or send via normal post. Even included the url for local postal rates.
She replied saying that she'd 'distriduted' (?) the price in the postage (whatever that means) and then subsequently acknowledged that she'd added $3 profit to the item in the postage. So $13 (for a $10 item), wan or not?
Super dishonest. Therefore the bad rating.
I don't think this is the usual practice in the auctions arena. I've traded there a couple of times, so far the sellers and buyers have been rather fantastic. But this one... *shake head*
What if she wanted a $10 profit instead?
So a war might begin here, well, too bad. She's dishonest what.
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Search Words
Gosh. I'm totally amused. Yet speechless. Try this. Go to http://sg.yahoo.com. Type in "mad sexually unsatisfied woman singapore blog" and click on Singapore. And you get YOURS TRULY. But while u're there, check out the Sept 17, 2003 post. :) Oh. And the Sept 10 as well. ;)
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
A New Skill
The 'Bad' News: Abby hasn't been piling on the fats according to tradition especially during the camp.
PIL: (Carrying her in the arms) She's lighter hor?
The Good News: SHE'S WAY MORE MOBILE!!! YAY!!! (I dun really care if she piles on the kilos according to man's plans, as long as she's meeting her nutritional requirements!)
Check it out! We're glad that she's not so heavy ladened and is achieving more as a result!
And she provides her own applause too! :D The first time she did got up on her own by moving backwards, both Ben and I witnessed it (at KL in our hotel room). It was awesome. ALL of us applauded and celebrated! :D
PIL: (Carrying her in the arms) She's lighter hor?
The Good News: SHE'S WAY MORE MOBILE!!! YAY!!! (I dun really care if she piles on the kilos according to man's plans, as long as she's meeting her nutritional requirements!)
Check it out! We're glad that she's not so heavy ladened and is achieving more as a result!
And she provides her own applause too! :D The first time she did got up on her own by moving backwards, both Ben and I witnessed it (at KL in our hotel room). It was awesome. ALL of us applauded and celebrated! :D
My Miss Shy Princess
She kept sticking her face to her granny! Only happy when alone in the room... otherwise she's got the perpetual pout the moment we *step* out of the hotel room!
Apparently shyness is inherited even though the parents have been able to overcome it. Hmmm... Yup, we *are* shy people you know? ;)
Monday, June 13, 2005
Back from the camp!
Gosh. It's been a wonderful trip. There's really too much to blog here, though I wish I could. But suffice to say, it's been life-changing. I'm glad I went. God has really been faithful. He showed me where I 'was' and where He wants me to be. Not in the material sense as we know it, but according to His perspective. Indeed,
"Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face
And the things of the world
Will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace."
Willing vessel + Holy Spirit Anointing + God's Light in His Consuming Fire = God's everlasting burning bush (think Moses)
The weight of His presence is real. I am truly humbled in His presence. He definitely is THE Almighty. We think we've got it together, but in His eyes, our apparently significant successes may not be worth much after all.
After a touch from God, I truly understand the meaning: 'this life is not mine'. As He impresses HIs affirmation, purpose and vision in my life, all the pain I experience just melts away. Because I know even people forsake me, I know my Lord will receive me. (Ps 27:10) For the first time in my life, I actually truly felt the intensity when my heart cried out, "God, how am I supposed to live without You?" I thought I knew, but now I know I knew so little.
I just pray that God will transform my life permanently and let it bear good fruits, and move beyond just a feel-good experience. A changed life is what I'm after - not just a rah-rah time and then life resumes. My life is changed. And I praise God for that.
"Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face
And the things of the world
Will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace."
Willing vessel + Holy Spirit Anointing + God's Light in His Consuming Fire = God's everlasting burning bush (think Moses)
The weight of His presence is real. I am truly humbled in His presence. He definitely is THE Almighty. We think we've got it together, but in His eyes, our apparently significant successes may not be worth much after all.
After a touch from God, I truly understand the meaning: 'this life is not mine'. As He impresses HIs affirmation, purpose and vision in my life, all the pain I experience just melts away. Because I know even people forsake me, I know my Lord will receive me. (Ps 27:10) For the first time in my life, I actually truly felt the intensity when my heart cried out, "God, how am I supposed to live without You?" I thought I knew, but now I know I knew so little.
I just pray that God will transform my life permanently and let it bear good fruits, and move beyond just a feel-good experience. A changed life is what I'm after - not just a rah-rah time and then life resumes. My life is changed. And I praise God for that.
Saturday, June 04, 2005
What assistance?
Someone explain this to me: After I call a local green logo mobile service provider's toll-free line to activate my auto-roaming, I am greeted with many options to respond to - which language, which area of assistance I need Part I, Part II, Part III etc... I spend a couple of minutes ($$) deciding which option is the best, and then when I finally get to the operator, I get, "Thank you for calling S*@#&*b. Good afternoon, I'm XXX. HOW MAY I ASSIST YOU?"
I thought you knew?
Then why do I even bother pressing so many buttons in the first place?
I'll not be a nice consumer anymore. I'LL GO FOR THE OPERATOR AT ONCE.
Oh. Better still. Last nite.
Ben called S@#$%#l coz he received a bill that showed he didn't have to pay his outstanding payment. It's most likely a heavenly bill or something. He decided to clarify things and called the mobile service provider. It's a 24hr hotline right? So he called around 12.20am. He was greeted with a "HARLOW?" Then he nicely enquired about his bill. Then the lady asked, "This bill is for Starhub, Singtel or M1 uh?"
Ah doi.
We have a long way to go.
I thought you knew?
Then why do I even bother pressing so many buttons in the first place?
I'll not be a nice consumer anymore. I'LL GO FOR THE OPERATOR AT ONCE.
Oh. Better still. Last nite.
Ben called S@#$%#l coz he received a bill that showed he didn't have to pay his outstanding payment. It's most likely a heavenly bill or something. He decided to clarify things and called the mobile service provider. It's a 24hr hotline right? So he called around 12.20am. He was greeted with a "HARLOW?" Then he nicely enquired about his bill. Then the lady asked, "This bill is for Starhub, Singtel or M1 uh?"
Ah doi.
We have a long way to go.
Amazing
I...got...my...results... God IS GOOD!!! :D Totally, purely his miracle!!! I got all Bs except for the 104 - the cheem cheem literature, the one I've been struggling with. I GOT A FOR THAT!?!?!?! Really IS God. Cannot. Believe. It.
After being out of touch, losing confidence, going through hell and fire, etc... I thought I was a goner. For this semester. But God is really good. He really blesses!
I can only say, "THANK YOU JESUS!!!"
After being out of touch, losing confidence, going through hell and fire, etc... I thought I was a goner. For this semester. But God is really good. He really blesses!
I can only say, "THANK YOU JESUS!!!"
Thursday, June 02, 2005
Magazines...and other Stuff...
Keep to read someday in faaaaaaaaaaaar future or throw? The answer is obvious right? But!!!! :S argh. Darn magazines. And newsletters. And bulletins. What about bills? Mobile phone bills? Keep or throw? So many things to decide. What to do with space?
Oh. Crucial question: I've got available display space but have no idea what to put there. I've been thinking about that for months. Now it's displaying the types of jarred food Abby is eating. But that really doesn't make nice display items. Problem is: There's no lighting available for that area, so at night, it's just dark, unlike the upper shelf which has got display lights. Hmm. What about displaying real fruits? Durians, bananas, jackfruit...
Oh. Crucial question: I've got available display space but have no idea what to put there. I've been thinking about that for months. Now it's displaying the types of jarred food Abby is eating. But that really doesn't make nice display items. Problem is: There's no lighting available for that area, so at night, it's just dark, unlike the upper shelf which has got display lights. Hmm. What about displaying real fruits? Durians, bananas, jackfruit...
How to Pack the Study and Bedroom
1. Assign categories to available storage area.
2. Go through items and either Throw, Recycle, Donate/Give Away, Sort (to keep or burn).
3. Put sorted items in designated areas.
Ta-da! There! It's so easy right? Then why have I been sitting on it since I got pregnant? :S
2. Go through items and either Throw, Recycle, Donate/Give Away, Sort (to keep or burn).
3. Put sorted items in designated areas.
Ta-da! There! It's so easy right? Then why have I been sitting on it since I got pregnant? :S
Wednesday, June 01, 2005
Mother
Had a discussion with my mum yesterday. VERY affected by her again. Sigh. It's amazing how different we are - our methods, techniques, ways we relate to people, etc. We'll definitely clash if we're both insistent on our ways. I must remember (hopefully she does too...) that we need to judge a tree by its fruits - good tree, good fruits, bad tree, bad fruits. I dunno how next week'll pass. I'll be rooming in with her the whole week. I pray we'll be harmonious.
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