Life's Choices

Was reading dooce's blog and she mentioned about having the luxury of making the choice of being a Stay At Home Mum (SAHM). Well, she mentions this person who believes that staying at home is copping out, and personally, I couldn't disagree more.

It's been my dream to be a SAHM since I don't know when. In fact, I used to think (and I still believe) that the first seven years of a child's life are the most important foundational years. So if I have three kids, I would be a SAHM for at least 10 to 15 years. BUT. I signed up with MOE. And the rest is history. Ironically, when I complete my bond, Abby would be seven. How ironic.

I've been on MOE's payroll since July 1999, while my elder SIL asked me to help one of her pals relief teach. That was a half-year stint, followed by another couple of month's worth of relief teaching (in 2001?) coz she had to go on maternity leave. I think after that, I got posted to my contract school for about 9 months before I got 'enlisted' into NIE. Starting the school year with my class is probably one of the most enjoyable aspects of school life - setting positive expectations, seeing the kids rise up to the positive expectations, and just helping them appreciate and enjoy themselves. One of my pals even commented that my class is very loving! Quite a surprising comment actually, coz I never thought we could describe a class that way. Hmm.

Anyway, instead of four years away from teaching, it's now 4.5 coz I deferred one semester in 2004 for Abby. Although I do enjoy NIE, I never regretted making that choice of deferring my studies for Abby. I can't imagine having to go to school full-time just after one month after delivery. Scary thought. Likewise, this time round, God has been real good. I said in my previous post that I've got four weeks of school left, and if I deliver from this point onwards, I just need to complete my assignments and go for my exams, which is way much lesser commitment than having to go to school fulltime. Effectively, my 'maternity leave' will last till probably 24 July 2006 when the new semester begins. That actually means it's 20 weeks of maternity leave! By the time I get back to school, Shalom would probably be at least 4 months old. Abby was about 5mo when I returned to school. I consider this a luxury already. :) Some people actually feel sorry for me for missing out on the maternity leave pay, but I would gladly take that and trade it for 9 months of anger-free pregnancy! I don't think shouting at kids in school is going to do well for the foetus; likewise, with the hormonal assaults on my system, I could turn real ugly. :P Pay me 3 extra months of 9 months of agony? I'll skip that option. At least I still have that luxury of skipping that option. Which means, if I persist in abiding by that decision, I probably won't be pregnant till I finish my bond, which would be in 2011, which makes me 34yrs old. Could try for No.3 if I'm still fit and healthy and financially stable and the marriage & family strong enough, which I believe God will help us to excel in. :)

Although I don't have the luxury of becoming a SAHM, having Ben's support in that area helps tremendously. In fact, we're thinking of just completing the bond and not teaching anymore after that. We'll see how things go. Right now, we have to decide if I need to apply to schools, just for one simple reason - Abby will enrol in that school to keep things simple. :) I'm still hoping, after so long, that I might be able to go back to PCS. Have been to a couple of other schools - relief teaching, practicum and final posting after diploma - but somehow my most enjoyable days have still been at PCS. But we'll see how things go. :)