Thursday, June 28, 2007
Monday, June 25, 2007
First Day Back At School
I'm just so so glad to be back at school. Not because I'm away from my darlings, but work's been lingling on my mind for the WHOLE month of June, and I'm just glad to be back to FOCUS on what has to be cleared.
I just moved tables because my cubicle and my colleague's had an 'en bloc sale' for nothing. Now I've taken over Abby's godma and it's a lovely place surrounded by great colleagues. Now I understand why she's reluctant to relocate. :'(
God was really with me the whole day today. I managed to carry out whatever I had planned to do in PEACE. Though the kids were rather unsettled, given that it's the first day back at school and it's a new seating arrangement which I think most of them are thrilled at their new positions except for a handful, I could literally sense God's presence in the classroom. I was almost worried sick about today, and I really didn't know how I was going to pull it off. I stayed till about 2am in the morning just preparing the lesson plans and had to wake up at 6. I prayed that I would wake up on time. Was rather worried and couldn't fall asleep properly. Ben hit the sack and knocked out straightaway even though he turned in later than me. He's really tired, my poor boy.
Anyway, I broke the news to my class today that I'd be taking them Maths. Prior to that, I'd warned them that I had news, and that that news could either be good or bad. But if it's bad news to them, they had to keep their reactions to themselves... and maintain a straight face... hahaha... :) Many cheered when they heard the EMS news! :) Praise the Lord! :D I really hope I can help them... please God, let me be a blessing to them especially in their studies...
I'm all excited and geared up to go! Although my backlog is horrendous, I thank God that He is helping me soar! It's really all glory to God! I still have my unbelievable deadlines, but I believe that with God, all things are possible! :D
I just moved tables because my cubicle and my colleague's had an 'en bloc sale' for nothing. Now I've taken over Abby's godma and it's a lovely place surrounded by great colleagues. Now I understand why she's reluctant to relocate. :'(
God was really with me the whole day today. I managed to carry out whatever I had planned to do in PEACE. Though the kids were rather unsettled, given that it's the first day back at school and it's a new seating arrangement which I think most of them are thrilled at their new positions except for a handful, I could literally sense God's presence in the classroom. I was almost worried sick about today, and I really didn't know how I was going to pull it off. I stayed till about 2am in the morning just preparing the lesson plans and had to wake up at 6. I prayed that I would wake up on time. Was rather worried and couldn't fall asleep properly. Ben hit the sack and knocked out straightaway even though he turned in later than me. He's really tired, my poor boy.
Anyway, I broke the news to my class today that I'd be taking them Maths. Prior to that, I'd warned them that I had news, and that that news could either be good or bad. But if it's bad news to them, they had to keep their reactions to themselves... and maintain a straight face... hahaha... :) Many cheered when they heard the EMS news! :) Praise the Lord! :D I really hope I can help them... please God, let me be a blessing to them especially in their studies...
I'm all excited and geared up to go! Although my backlog is horrendous, I thank God that He is helping me soar! It's really all glory to God! I still have my unbelievable deadlines, but I believe that with God, all things are possible! :D
Saturday, June 23, 2007
Church Camp, Kids Sick, Lina's Back!, Approaching Avalanche
Haven't been able to blog coz my hands (and feet) are tied with overwhelming responsibilities. Nevertheless, I'm glad life's almost back to sanity. We returned from church camp on the 15th and it was AMAZING. When I first arrived there, I was spent. Tired. Fatigued. During the first session, Ps Martin Steel spoke about coming with a heart of expectancy. I just expected to survive the camp. Nothing else. But God just was amazing. Actually, I was anything but enthusiastic. I was bitter, fatigued, worried, aching, miserable etc... so when Ps Martin asked us to get into groups of 2s and 3s to pray for one another, I wasn't that excited about it. In fact I wanted to go back to the room. However, it seemed like God had other plans. This lady turned around and smiled at me after the instructions, and so I went up to her and joined hands with her. She just said, "Let's pray as the Holy Spirit leads." I was like, hmm... alright. I felt this strong anointing on her, but since I was so out-of-shape emotionally, spiritually, etc, I just went along with her.
When she started praying, she was spot on for every single bug in my life. From that coldness in my heart, to the fatigue, to that silent isolation which I hardly told anyone, and even healing for the backache which I have been having. God was indeed alive and kicking, through her I felt heard and alive. I cried like a baby and just simply couldn't stop. She understood. I had not even said a word and she understood.
The next evening, when she saw me again, she rejoiced. She saw that I was completely different. Indeed I was. With that divine encounter, I couldn't stay the same - cynical and embittered. In fact, upon hindsight, I believe it was because I had to serve on the worship team the next morning that I had this 'clean-up' so that I could worship Jesus without hindrance and to help lead His people to worship Him. Anyway, she said that she had such a huge burden for me the evening before that when she returned to her hotel room, she continued praying in tears for me. God really works wonders.
Besides this encounter, my cell-groupmates had the burden for everyone to come together before the day starts and after the day's activities to pray together. Every morning at 6.40am before the 7am prayer service and 10.30pm after the evening service. It was very exciting! In fact, as we gathered around outside the conference room to pray, our dearest pastor Mark was moved to tears at seeing that passion in our cell. Everyone has been ignited. And we need to protect our fire and fan the flame. Usually after each church camp, when the fire is not well-protected, it would perish due to neglect. However, when we united and close ranks, the fire keeps on burning. In fact, the cell now gathers at 7.30pm to have a pre-cell prayer before cell at 8.20, and yesterday cell was radically different! In fact our worship leader said that of all the cell meetings she's attended, yesterday was the most exciting so far! It was amazing! :D Praise God!
I'm so glad the kids have bonded so well with the cell group, especially with Eileen, Soks, Jeremy, Chellie and Anderson. Usually the kids would be rather shy, but after this camp and now that we're meeting so regularly, they are family to the kids!
God's really so good. In spite of challenges like Shalom's 40.3 deg Cel fever, we continued praying as well as giving med, sponging, and miraculously, today he's all well! Yesterday he was still above 39.5. Unfortunately, Abby's now down with fever, hovering around 39 plus, so it's really back to prayer, medication and sponging. As the cell prayed for healing for the two kids, we were expecting healing. Shalom's healed! Now's Abby's turn!
Praise God that Lina's back! Ben and I have learnt to appreciate her way much more, as we've had experience with other helpers during her absence, and the way she works is absolutely commendable. I'm just glad God's blessed us with her.
The hols are coming to an end, but God's proven Himself faithful. Although I feel like I'm treading into an absolutely chaotic territory come Monday, He has promised that He will see me through it all. Through Anderson's testimony during cell, I am encouraged by how the seemingly huge workpile was easily dealt with. I really pray for supernatural time management and efficiency so that I will meet my deadlines and be a responsible and proactive teacher. This really calls for a miracle!
When she started praying, she was spot on for every single bug in my life. From that coldness in my heart, to the fatigue, to that silent isolation which I hardly told anyone, and even healing for the backache which I have been having. God was indeed alive and kicking, through her I felt heard and alive. I cried like a baby and just simply couldn't stop. She understood. I had not even said a word and she understood.
The next evening, when she saw me again, she rejoiced. She saw that I was completely different. Indeed I was. With that divine encounter, I couldn't stay the same - cynical and embittered. In fact, upon hindsight, I believe it was because I had to serve on the worship team the next morning that I had this 'clean-up' so that I could worship Jesus without hindrance and to help lead His people to worship Him. Anyway, she said that she had such a huge burden for me the evening before that when she returned to her hotel room, she continued praying in tears for me. God really works wonders.
Besides this encounter, my cell-groupmates had the burden for everyone to come together before the day starts and after the day's activities to pray together. Every morning at 6.40am before the 7am prayer service and 10.30pm after the evening service. It was very exciting! In fact, as we gathered around outside the conference room to pray, our dearest pastor Mark was moved to tears at seeing that passion in our cell. Everyone has been ignited. And we need to protect our fire and fan the flame. Usually after each church camp, when the fire is not well-protected, it would perish due to neglect. However, when we united and close ranks, the fire keeps on burning. In fact, the cell now gathers at 7.30pm to have a pre-cell prayer before cell at 8.20, and yesterday cell was radically different! In fact our worship leader said that of all the cell meetings she's attended, yesterday was the most exciting so far! It was amazing! :D Praise God!
I'm so glad the kids have bonded so well with the cell group, especially with Eileen, Soks, Jeremy, Chellie and Anderson. Usually the kids would be rather shy, but after this camp and now that we're meeting so regularly, they are family to the kids!
God's really so good. In spite of challenges like Shalom's 40.3 deg Cel fever, we continued praying as well as giving med, sponging, and miraculously, today he's all well! Yesterday he was still above 39.5. Unfortunately, Abby's now down with fever, hovering around 39 plus, so it's really back to prayer, medication and sponging. As the cell prayed for healing for the two kids, we were expecting healing. Shalom's healed! Now's Abby's turn!
Praise God that Lina's back! Ben and I have learnt to appreciate her way much more, as we've had experience with other helpers during her absence, and the way she works is absolutely commendable. I'm just glad God's blessed us with her.
The hols are coming to an end, but God's proven Himself faithful. Although I feel like I'm treading into an absolutely chaotic territory come Monday, He has promised that He will see me through it all. Through Anderson's testimony during cell, I am encouraged by how the seemingly huge workpile was easily dealt with. I really pray for supernatural time management and efficiency so that I will meet my deadlines and be a responsible and proactive teacher. This really calls for a miracle!
Friday, June 08, 2007
Flying Thoughts
Playing the role of a homemaker these few days has knocked my breath out, especially with Shalom sick again. Also, with the setting of the P5EM3 SA2 paper at the back of my mind (vetting on the Wed of the first week when school reopens!!) it's been challenging. I've bonded really well with the kids, and Abby's whining less.
But...
MIL and helper has been coming over since Wednesday because Shalom was falling ill - difficult to take care of one fussy and sick kid and the other one wanting a playmate all the time - and I can't say it's been easier. For one, when we play, I try to get the kids to pack before moving on to something else. But with the other adult around who's also pullling things out and wanting to do something with them and then abandoning it halfway (like pulling out Abby's PJs and wanting to go through them to see which are too small in the midst of their winding down period which is usually a mad time) it's been messy.
Really messy.
But the most frustrating - is the part where she's screaming at the maid so often. And I can tell that the poor maid really can't understand bahasa malayu because she's indonesian, and my MIL keeps raising her voice in frustration in an effort to EXPLAIN CLEARER to the maid. Doesn't she understand that BY SPEAKING LOUDER IN A LANGUAGE SOMEONE ELSE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND WILL NOT MAKE THEM UNDERSTAND ANY BETTER?
Try loud Hainanese with a non-Hainanese Chinese speaker.
Sigh.
Another trivial incident - wanted to give Shalom medication. Bottle said "3q of a teaspoon". Standard teaspoon is 5ml, so mathematically it is 3.75ml right? Nooo... MIL's logic - must use the teaspoon given by clinic and get 3/4 (mind you, the base of the teaspoon has less surface area than the top) because 3/4 of a teaspoon is less than 3.75ml using a syringe. "3.75ml too much. 3/4 teaspoon ok!" argh.
I tried explaining to her.
Me: Three quarters of a teaspoon is 3.75ml.
She: No, the syringe too much. I feel that the spoon just nice.
Me: You see, half of 5ml is 2.5 right?
She: ...
Me: and half of 2.5 is 1.25 right?
She:...
Me: Add 1.25 and 2.5 up that's 3/4 of 5ml.
(As I'm blogging this I think I should have just saved my breath.)
She: No, I think too much. 3/4 of teaspoon just nice.
Me: (knock head on wall)
I even showed her. I used water in a syringe and placed 5ml onto the teaspoon given by clinic. I proved it to her. But still. No no. Cannot.
This kind, if my Science student, I die.
Sigh.
Camp's coming up next week. On the final night of the camp, we're supposed to dress up and "Live our Dreams". What's my dream? I've been asking myself. A businesswoman? Nah. A librarian? Maybe. But I see myself carrying two kids, in charge of the household and homeschooling them.
And through these few days, I realised that I need household help to be able to homeschool them effectively. Otherwise they'll just end up learning how to do the housework for 6 years. Not very good for a homeschooling syllabus.
I need to get in touch with myself once again. To get alone and gather my thoughts. Ben's been far too busy and I'm all alone in this no-Lina period. He does try to help but I can tell it's really stretching him. Work's just cruel to him. I think he's really missing out on the kids' childhood at the rate he's working. I'm sure there are those jobs which do actually knock off at 5. Shan't say too much about his work, lest he gets into trouble.
As for myself, from next term onwards, I want to work decent hours instead of 7 to 7. I hope to leave at 4 and spend time with the kids, despite the messy house and noisy environment. Blardy frustrating.
But...
MIL and helper has been coming over since Wednesday because Shalom was falling ill - difficult to take care of one fussy and sick kid and the other one wanting a playmate all the time - and I can't say it's been easier. For one, when we play, I try to get the kids to pack before moving on to something else. But with the other adult around who's also pullling things out and wanting to do something with them and then abandoning it halfway (like pulling out Abby's PJs and wanting to go through them to see which are too small in the midst of their winding down period which is usually a mad time) it's been messy.
Really messy.
But the most frustrating - is the part where she's screaming at the maid so often. And I can tell that the poor maid really can't understand bahasa malayu because she's indonesian, and my MIL keeps raising her voice in frustration in an effort to EXPLAIN CLEARER to the maid. Doesn't she understand that BY SPEAKING LOUDER IN A LANGUAGE SOMEONE ELSE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND WILL NOT MAKE THEM UNDERSTAND ANY BETTER?
Try loud Hainanese with a non-Hainanese Chinese speaker.
Sigh.
Another trivial incident - wanted to give Shalom medication. Bottle said "3q of a teaspoon". Standard teaspoon is 5ml, so mathematically it is 3.75ml right? Nooo... MIL's logic - must use the teaspoon given by clinic and get 3/4 (mind you, the base of the teaspoon has less surface area than the top) because 3/4 of a teaspoon is less than 3.75ml using a syringe. "3.75ml too much. 3/4 teaspoon ok!" argh.
I tried explaining to her.
Me: Three quarters of a teaspoon is 3.75ml.
She: No, the syringe too much. I feel that the spoon just nice.
Me: You see, half of 5ml is 2.5 right?
She: ...
Me: and half of 2.5 is 1.25 right?
She:...
Me: Add 1.25 and 2.5 up that's 3/4 of 5ml.
(As I'm blogging this I think I should have just saved my breath.)
She: No, I think too much. 3/4 of teaspoon just nice.
Me: (knock head on wall)
I even showed her. I used water in a syringe and placed 5ml onto the teaspoon given by clinic. I proved it to her. But still. No no. Cannot.
This kind, if my Science student, I die.
Sigh.
Camp's coming up next week. On the final night of the camp, we're supposed to dress up and "Live our Dreams". What's my dream? I've been asking myself. A businesswoman? Nah. A librarian? Maybe. But I see myself carrying two kids, in charge of the household and homeschooling them.
And through these few days, I realised that I need household help to be able to homeschool them effectively. Otherwise they'll just end up learning how to do the housework for 6 years. Not very good for a homeschooling syllabus.
I need to get in touch with myself once again. To get alone and gather my thoughts. Ben's been far too busy and I'm all alone in this no-Lina period. He does try to help but I can tell it's really stretching him. Work's just cruel to him. I think he's really missing out on the kids' childhood at the rate he's working. I'm sure there are those jobs which do actually knock off at 5. Shan't say too much about his work, lest he gets into trouble.
As for myself, from next term onwards, I want to work decent hours instead of 7 to 7. I hope to leave at 4 and spend time with the kids, despite the messy house and noisy environment. Blardy frustrating.
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